Article Response #6: Break-ups hurt EVERYONE

Aside

Article: http://goodwomenproject.com/from-the-men/break-ups-hurt-us-too

Title: From The Men: Breakups Hurt Us Too

Author:  Stephen (no last name given)

Main topic: an article written in a personal letter format, addressed to all ladies on the topic of the stereotype that men move on immediately after a breakup

 

I always find articles like this interesting; perhaps because I have an interest in psychology (and relationships are a huge part of it!), perhaps because these sorts of articles are written in such a sincere and honest fashion, or perhaps because there is STILL so much confusion and arguments over these topics.

The latter is understandable, and the main reason for the continuing controversy (despite so many confessions and “truths” being discussed) is that every man is different. Some men, yes, will move on immediately, as if they were never attached in the first place (and they probably weren’t if they reacted in such a manner). But other men will brood over breakups much longer than the females will. It is thus apparently very hard to put a label on men collectively, because like women, they all have different responses to breaking up. From the collective, broad perspective, men perhaps do seem to move on faster. However, I think I agree with Stephen in that men are simply just better at hiding their emotions. Women aren’t the only ones that fall deeply in love.

I like that this article is written with such an honest and sincere tone. It makes me feel like Stephen is going through some sorrow -perhaps even a hard breakup- himself. Moreover, the readers will then lean in closer to be touched by his words, and his article will reach a bigger audience on a deeper level.

In conclusion, relationships continue to be a complex issue in all societies, and the best thing we can do in order to work on them is to talk about them. This article does just that, so I have no complaints.

Sonnet: Love, lost in time

This is the sonnet version of “Love, lost in time” (Petrarchan format). Man, this took a long time to construct 0_o I think I’ve really warmed up to sonnets though. I’m starting to use the rhythm in other normal poems too 😀

Please give feedback!

Love, Lost in Time

The tale of us has turned to just a scrawl;

And withered and decayed right to its core.

I want us back the way we were before;

But even that I can’t seem to recall.

Please tell me, what is love if this is all?

Of interest and charm there should be more.

Inertia turned excitement to a bore;

Adventure all but slowed down to a crawl.

I know something must give, this can’t go on;

But I’m afraid to do it on my own,

And I can’t just will us to grow sublime.

Nothing will change unless you move a pawn,

So maybe my courage has yet to grow;

Till then, our love is somewhere stuck in time.

My sonnet’s echo: Lost in Time

Maybe I’m watching too many romantic dramas, but the biggest source of inspiration I have now are hardships in relationships -.-. I was writing a sonnet this morning, and this is a more complex version of it I put together from all the brainstorming ideas and scraps I had written down; it feels like a much more complete poem than the sonnet, even if it doesn’t follow the criteria.

Love, lost in time

The tale of us, when read, might just appal

Because, somehow, it’s turned into a scrawl

We’ve withered and decayed right to our core

I want it back: the tale afore it tore

But now I can’t recall it anymore

…What was even there, back then, before?

Please tell me, what is love, if this is all?

Adventure all but slowed down to a crawl

Of interest and charm there should be more

Inertia turned excitement to a bore

What first was fun and new is now a chore

I want a change to open a new door.

Moreover, what are we, if this is it?

We did have some good days I must admit;

But always shadowed by a sense of drag.

The voice in my head just won’t stop to nag.

I keep thinking more love will somehow spawn

But something of nothing cannot be drawn

To tears and fights relationships are prone

But ours more than any you’d have known

And slowly on me it’s starting to dawn

That hope for us may be forever gone

Still I can’t get myself to just let go

Maybe it’s better off, but I won’t know

I know something must give, this can’t go on;

Nothing will change unless you move a pawn.

But I’m afraid to do it on my own;

My courage maybe isn’t yet full grown.

Yet I can’t just will us to turn sublime:

For now, our love is somewhere lost in time.

Poetry Response #7

A Dream Within A Dream 
by Edgar Allan Poe
Take this kiss upon the brow!
And, in parting from you now,
Thus much let me avow–
You are not wrong, who deem
That my days have been a dream;
Yet if hope has flown away
In a night, or in a day,
In a vision, or in none,
Is it therefore the less gone?
All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream.

I stand amid the roar
Of a surf-tormented shore,
And I hold within my hand
Grains of the golden sand–
How few! yet how they creep
Through my fingers to the deep,
While I weep–while I weep!
O God! can I not grasp
Them with a tighter clasp?
O God! can I not save
One from the pitiless wave?
Is all that we see or seem
But a dream within a dream?

Date of reading: October 30th
Main theme: loss, and the nature of reality
My response: 
I was really surprised by this poem because it seems to incorporate many complex elements into a relatively short piece of work. The author touches on the feelings of hurt and loss that he experienced from losing his wife, but there are also some metaphysical questions brought up, whether he meant to or not, and a lot of symbolism. However I think that this is a great way to express the poem because he no doubt felt a lot of anguish and turmoil after the passing away of his wife – and all his emotions were confused and mixed up.
The biggest hook for me in this poem was the ‘dream within a dream” part – what did he mean? A dream is something that is not real, and that we cannot control – a dream within that would be an even deeper level of non-real and uncontrollable. By saying that perhaps life is all just a dream within a dream, it kind of calls into question the nature of reality – is anything real? Do we have any control of our fate? How can we know?
But maybe his interpretation of that was something simpler, just that he feels like he can’t control his life very much, just like in a dream. The dream within that dream may be more specific, individual aspects of life – he uses the example of a tide, and says he can’t even stop a few grains of sand by being washed away by the “pitiless wave”. This is also symbolic of the passing of his wife – he couldn’t stop her from being “washed away” by death. Perhaps he wishes that life could be just a dream, because then it would mean that the loss of his wife isn’t real  – “Is it therefore the less gone?”
He may have used words such as “golden” and “grains of sand” to be symbolic of other things too – the great quality of a relationship, or the passing of time in a sand hour-glass – but I only found this out by reading other reviews online. To me, the feelings that really stand out are his deep missing of his wife – he wishes so desperately that she is back, he even accepts her beliefs that he thought were wrong before (“And, in parting from you now, / Thus much let me avow– / You are not wrong, who deem / That my days have been a dream”) – he now misses her so much, he wants back even the stuff he disagreed with in the relationship before, like different viewpoints.